11/23/22

Tomato, To-mah-to

November 16, 2022

As a writer (I'm playing pretty fast and loose with that definition), I am fascinated with words and pronunciations. How a word is pronounced can either be vital to its usage and its meaning, or it can be pretty meaningless in the scheme of things. Some words don’t have much variance, but others can be wildly different. Some pronunciations can depend on regionality or dialect, while others are simply learned behavior passed down through generations. I was thirty-something before I realized there were not two Rs in sherbet. Everyone in my family had called it ‘Orange Sherbert’. I was horrified and a little embarrassed when I discovered the truth. Worcestershire notwithstanding, I enjoy digging in and finding the correct articulation. There is a lot of digging required in most arenas.

Disney parks are no exception to the rule. There is a handful of experiences, restaurants, etc. that seem to defy common English logic. Of course a few of these AREN’T English, so that makes a fair amount of sense. I mean is it [tra-TOR’-ee-uh] al Forno or is it [tra-tor-EE’-a] al Forno? Is it [ah-ker-SHOOS’] or is it [a-kers-HOOS’]? Are they the Three [kah-buh-LE’-ros] or the Three [kah-buh-YE’-ros]? Is it [en-CHANT’-mint] or [gar-baj-re-place-ment-for-HAP’-pily-ev-er-af-ter]? So many questions.

So am I here to clear the air and get to the bottom of all of these linguistic riddles?

Absolutely not.

I am here to rank my five most overrated dining experiences. Is it a bit of a bait and switch? Sure, but this is infinitely more interesting and will certainly make people WAY more irritated, so I’m gonna go with it. No matter what one chooses as an overrated restaurant, it will be someone’s favorite. Therefore I’m sure jimmies will be rustled, but I cannot pass up the opportunity to make fellow Disney adults hate me, so here goes. These are in no particular order.

Number 5: Whispering Canyon Café

This was a must-do for our family for several years, but post-Covid it just hasn’t lived up to the hype. The schtick is still pretty entertaining if you get a good server, but the food just isn’t amazing. I feel like the meats aren’t as high quality as they used to be, and let’s be honest, you go to Whispering Canyon for the meats. It’s still not a bad meal (none of the restaurants on this list are what I consider bad) but it just doesn’t live up to the accolades that it is constantly getting. I feel like this particular restaurant is simply resting on their laurels and coasting on reputation. I certainly don’t need much motivation to take a trip to Wilderness Lodge, but now that motivation has moved primarily to Geyser Point.

Number 4: Beaches & Cream Soda Shop

Hey, HEY, put down the pitchforks and torches. I love their ice cream. The No Way Jose is so so good, but having had a few meals there now, I am just not impressed with their savory options. I’ve heard people sing the praises of their grilled cheese and tomato soup, and admittedly I have not tried this. I just can’t see going to WDW and ordering something my grade school cafeteria served. The burger and French dip were extremely meh. Not horrible. Just meh.

Number 3: Toledo – Tapas, Steak & Seafood

I have only done this restaurant once, but it was certainly a one-and-done. Any list like this is always going to be very subjective, and this entry is a great example of this. The very idea of “small plates” irritates me. I don’t want to share and only get one bite of something. What if I love it? Too bad, it’s gone. If I want to share a bunch of appetizers, I’ll go to Applebee’s and get them half price from 8 -10. My wife and I didn’t even order small plates. We ordered entrees and I guess the kitchen is just locked into “small plate mode”. They were tiny. I had bariatric surgery last year and cannot eat like I used to, and I still thought the portion sizes were pitiful. Were they tasty? Yes. It wasn’t bad, just underwhelming. Which is a real shame because the location is terrific!

Number 2: Wolfgang Puck Bar and Grill

I haven’t had many opportunities to eat at restaurants that are associated with a celebrity chef, so I was really looking forward to this experience. It did not pay off. Once again, it wasn’t bad. I’ve had many worse meals in my life, but my expectations were much higher. The atmosphere was bland. The service was mediocre at best. And the food was serviceable. If you’re going to name your eatery after a world renowned chef, you need to bring it a little harder than this. Luckily, the company for the meal was excellent, so I will always remember the meal fondly, but I have zero interest in going back.

Number 1: Topolino’s Terrace – Flavors of the Riviera

This is the one that disappointed me the most. Ironically, this one was also probably the best meal of any of the other restaurants on this particular list. It was very difficult to get an ADR, which doesn’t always reflect quality (looking at you Be Our Guest), but between my Mouse Dining alerts, Touring Plans alerts, and stalking the website, I worked so hard to get it. We tried it for dinner, and we tried it for breakfast, and both were good. Good. For the price I paid, I needed quite a bit better than good. The location was great, but the atmosphere was frankly sterile. It was stuffy and certainly did not have the energy of other signature places like Flying Fish or California Grill. Those places have an electric vibe. Topolino’s did not. The server we had for dinner was extremely knowledgeable. She told me the name of Farmer Troy’s cow that provided the cheese on our board. However, we felt underdressed and out of place. Breakfast was better, but neither meal was worth the exorbitant price tag.

So there you have it; my subjective and opinionated list. I fully realize that I’ve offended half of our community, but I can only go by my own experiences. None of these places are bad, and I cannot state that enough. For me and my family, these are just overrated.